Albacete Warrior Evaluate | TheXboxHub

We might in all probability depend the video games which have made us snigger constantly on one hand. Perhaps on two fingers. It’s so, so tough, not solely as a result of humour is wildly subjective, however comedic timing is extremely arduous when the participant has management over that timing. It’s a marvel that humorous video games even exist. 

Albacete Warrior is a comedic achievement. However not as a result of it manages to hitch the elite membership of video games which are genuinely humorous. Albacete Warrior is, with none doubt, the least humorous comedy recreation we now have ever performed. Which is, certainly, an achievement (and we’ve performed Eat Lead: The Return of Matt Hazard). The badness feels willful, just like the builders wished that crown. In some way, it manages to make us sigh and cringe on the identical time. We singe. 

Let’s offer you a style. The Spanish ninja, Benito, grabs the neck of a rooster and makes use of it as a weapon. However that rooster is white, so for the whole the rest of the sport Benito makes jokes about his white cock, strangling his cock, flashing his cock at women, and using his cock to a brand new stage. It goes on and on and frigging on, like that annoying one who thinks you haven’t heard a joke, so retains repeating it, time and again, getting nearer and extra frantic and determined. Cock. Cock. COCK.

Bosses don’t simply assault you, they fart, crap and flash themselves at you. Trump turns up, as a result of that’s humorous sufficient by itself, apparently. It’s a bit like Jim Davidson taking on the writing of a Mrs Brown’s Boys episode, should you can think about that. 

What makes all of this a comedic hellscape is that it’s poorly translated, too. Albacete Warrior is clearly written by somebody whose English shouldn’t be of the best normal, and that’s effective. However when mixed with the smutty jokes, you typically simply get complicated burps of crudeness that don’t make a lot sense. If it was on Recreation Go, we would have inspired you to strive it at no cost, simply to see what it’s like. It’s an expertise. 

The graphics redeem issues a bit. We fairly just like the look of Albacete Warrior, using because it does on the highly regarded 2.5D artwork type. Flat 2D sprites trundle round on a 3D setting, like Octopath Traveller if everybody took some LSD and began a farting competitors. It’s obtained some nostalgic hints of Starfox-era 16-bit video games, and we felt proper at dwelling. 

The music’s nice too. Whereas we have been groaning from the comedy, confused by the story, and bashing our heads towards the lounge desk because of the gameplay (that’s a deal with we’re but to disclose), then no less than we had a very good soundtrack to take pleasure in. There’s an eclectic mixture of types right here, which inserts the entire ‘Spanish ninja’ culture-mashup to a tee. 

However the gameplay. Oh gods, the unholy gameplay. Albacete Warrior is an action-platformer. We’d have paid chilly, arduous money for it to have simply caught to the ‘motion’ bit, because the platformer suffix is nightmare gas. We nonetheless can’t consider we managed to finish sure platforming sequences in Albacete Warrior. 

The place to even begin. There may be essentially the most pronounced, complicated lag to the leap that we now have possible ever skilled. We counted precise seconds between urgent the leap button and the leap occurring on-screen. That is made worse – worse – in conditions like wall-jumps. You will be clinging onto a wall, urgent the leap button, however don’t have any response in any respect from Benito. He continues to slip down, blinking at us and doubtless fascinated by cock.

When he does leap from the wall, that leap is completely random. It could be an enormous leap, springing with extra pace than he actually ought to. Or it may very well be a diddy one, leaving barely any room for a double-jump or sprint that will get you to the opposite platform. It’s an entire roll of the cube. Now think about twenty, thirty of those jumps in sequence, and you must begin once more should you fail. It’s water torture. We have now given up, spun round, picked up the pad, had one other go, after which given up extra instances than we are able to depend. 

Depth notion is a factor, too. Benito, presumably as a result of he’s 2D, casts no shadow, so leaping into or out of the digicam turns into a minefield. A minefield with no depth notion. 

We might record these points all day. The double-jump typically doesn’t trouble triggering. The push, too. There’s a slight slide as you start and finish a leap, so you’ll be able to simply tumble off platforms should you land near an edge. Candy Mary, Mom of Jesus, Albacete Warrior is a travesty of a platformer. 

It’s actually higher as a brawler, however we now have to watch out right here. The fight is so, so a lot better than its platforming that it’s straightforward to go excessive and have fun it as some sort of second-coming of fight. However, with some detachment, it’s merely okay. The 2D sprites in a 3D setting results in an terrible lot of imprecision, as you suppose you’ve sidled as much as a sombrero-wearing enemy, solely to seek out that you’re off by a pixel. The depth notion assaults once more. 

However join with an enemy, and there’s some enjoyable right here. Combos will be fashioned with the X, Y and B buttons, and a blink-out-of-existence RT transfer is a refreshing tackle the dodge-roll. Bosses, after they’re not strolling punchlines, are fairly good too. They arrive packaged with a number of phases and assaults, and killing them is a real problem. In addition they include the reassurance that there gained’t be any sodding platforming for the subsequent 5 minutes. 

There’s one solitary evaluate of Albacete Warrior on-line, on the time of writing, they usually have been gushing with reward for its humour. It exhibits how subjective comedic video games will be, as a result of we discovered Albacete Warrior to be dumbfoundingly unfunny, like a moist fart at a funeral. Truly, Albacete Warrior would have chuckled at that one. 

However when that clunky humour is coupled with some stunningly unhealthy platforming, you may have a recreation that you simply’d must be really masochistic to strive. Truthfully, it’s not value it.

You should buy Albacete Warrior from the Xbox Retailer